As the decade draws to a close, I am not one for doing the New Year, New Me as it’s pointless and just puts pressure on me to achieve things I might not.
Starting this decade though I did just that, put pressure on myself in a way I now know was unreasonable.
The main pressure I have put on myself over at least eight of those years has been about losing weight and trying to look like society led me to believe I should.
Cleansing Social Media
Recently I went through my friend’s list and groups that I follow on Facebook, quite a few friends had already bitten the bullet prior to the general election as I couldn’t cope with the vitriol that was being spouted daily on my timeline.
But groups, I haven’t had a good clear out of groups since forever, I just keep adding to them but as the new year, new you started to crop up on my timeline along with various pills, potions, teas and coffees being peddled in the sale groups I was in, I decided they all had to go for my own mental health if nothing else.
I also started reporting ads that kept appearing as offensive because do you know what, they are offensive to me, you are advising me to change me and what if I don’t want to change.
Getting into the right headspace
As you will see from this post I have spent years and years trying to get to a place in my head where I can take the mirror shot and look back at it and think, yeah that’s me, that’s all of me and I love me for me.
So, I don’t need you peddling your shit to me telling me how much weight I can lose, I don’t need you showing me before and after pictures and I most certainly don’t need you to tell me I have lost weight, I know I have as it happens by my clothes but I haven’t done that for any reason it has just happened but I am still the same person on the inside whether I lose 4 stone or gain 4 stone.
Throwing away the scales
One of the items I threw away with great glee when I moved earlier this year was my WeightWatchers scales, those scales I had religiously stood on every Sunday for as long as I can remember, those scales that made me feel like a failure when they moved upwards, those scales I would often move onto different flooring in the hope that the figure might go down, it never did in fact sometimes it went up!
My life was completely ruled by them along with all of the size labels in clothes, it’s strange really as we don’t flinch if our bra size goes up, yet I had a rule for years that once I hit a size 18 in trousers I had to lose weight.
Cut out the labels!
But, that’s the clothing industry that has done that to us and they don’t all size the same, some haven’t changed the way they size in years and therefore you should never be ruled by the size on your clothing, if it bothers you that much, cut the label out.
The crap that is peddled
Thankfully because I have always had IBS I have never even tried the shakes, pills and potions that are peddled daily, some even by friends, these things at best give you the shits, which I have enough of thanks very much and at worse start to have effect on your organs as you aren’t getting enough nutrients.
I have though, spent years on and off both WeightWatchers and slimming world, and I noticed just today doing my food shop both slimming world and WeightWatchers meals take priority on the new in stock.
The email subscriptions that I have are all full of the January let’s go to the gym and get fit, thrusting new gym wear at you along with offers of gym membership or just buying the equipment for you to use in your home, which I can guarantee will very quickly become a clothes horse or given away on a selling site by no later than March.
To top off January 1st in my inbox is this beauty!
It’s official I am obese and I am putting all my organs under extra stress because of it, I might add I am also doing the same by smoking, drinking and taking drugs, I only partake in one of those but you get my drift!
So what do we do?
Each to their own but why does every new year have to be the same, why are we continuously shamed for the way we eat at Christmas and new year, at the end of the day it’s a week of indulgence, none of us do it all of the time so drop the guilt-inducing crap and just let us enjoy what we want to eat, where we want to eat and with who we want to eat it.
Life is too damn short, live every day like it’s your last and if that means eating that cheesecake with full fat thick cream then do it, but don’t then follow with comments of you will have to go and work it off in the gym or eat sawdust for the next month, just enjoy it for what it is.
Please don’t think I am against losing weight or getting fit, there is nothing wrong with living a healthier lifestyle, what I take serious umbrage too is the diet industry peddling its wares in the hope that in six months time you will have to go back again because you will have put more on.
This is the industry that is putting pressure on the next generations not the likes of Georgina at Fuller Figure Fuller Bust who has just received a rant from a very angry parent saying she is promoting obesity, the angry parent obviously doesn’t follow her as George spends an awful lot of her time in the gym and also promotes healthy eating.
Please check out Jo’s post as she describes me all far better than me Journey Through the Fog
Blood Pressure update
You will know from reading my last post, if not it’s here, that I had to dial 999 on Christmas Eve because of chest pains and while the paramedics were taking my obs, it was noted how high my blood pressure was.
This has continued since and after monitoring for a few days myself it wasn’t showing any signs of coming down so I went back to the GP on New Year’s Eve and she has prescribed me with medication to see if they can bring it down to a safe level.
However, while I was with the GP she asked me what my height was and how much I weighed, I could tell her my height but I had no idea how much I weighed, standing on the scales, I have in fact lost a stone since the last time I was weighed, probably in hospital at my neuro appointment in May 2019, but I did make a point of saying I aren’t ruled by it so that’s why I didn’t know what it was and surprisingly she agreed with me.
I wish everyone a Happy New Year but please don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourselves because society tells you too.